• https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OY2wnEGn_cE/V80uockjicI/AAAAAAAAZ8o/r_3CotN5E6U-CUieGteAgUvmn7wuNEzrQCLcB/s1600/do%2Bnot%2Bbe%2Bweary%2Bin%2Bwell%2Bdoinf.jpg

24.12.18

Life After "Honeymoon"

We have just had the most beautiful honeymoon vacation ever. As we walked into the living room, reality hit me. I cried. And cried some more. This is a house. Not a home yet. How do I make it a home? When will I start feeling at home here? Suddenly, I started to miss my mum, my dad and my two brothers.

I cried. . .

After Honeymoon


Maybe post-wedding blues are totally normal. Maybe this feeling is expected. After all the excitement of the wedding and honeymoon, it’s natural to feel a dip in mood.

I couldn't explain my flowing tears that night. I was just. . . down. Series of thoughts ran through my mind;

how can I stay excited in this marriage?
how can I continue to have adventures with my husband?
how can I be a great wife?
how do I start building a home?
how.  . .???
just how???

4.12.18

November To Remember (2018)

I kept a daily record of moods and events which I found memorable in November 2017. So I thought to myself, why not do it again? It's been a thrilling experience!

November 2018



I am a big fan of keeping diaries. Journaling daily is the most creative and powerful keystone habit you can acquire. When done correctly, you will show up better in every area of your life. Every area!

When you start writing, new horizons of thought open in the palace of your mind. =You’ll even need to put your pen down and take a few breaths. You’ll be captivated not only by the amazing things in your life, but by the awe and wonders of life in general.

My heart is so filled with thanksgiving for November 2018.

27.11.18

DIARY: What It Feels Like To Be Engaged

I know what it felt like to hear about my closest friends getting engaged, it is a great feeling! However, emotionally, there is no dress rehearsals for that feeling when it's your turn. Mehn

The Feeling Of Being Engaged


In few minutes, I'll be swearing an oath before the court of law to stick with this man for the rest of my life. All focus on us now, this is it, together, forever, starting right this second. Oh my gosh. It's happening for realllll.

I'm engaged. As in, I'm about to be married. I mean, I'm getting marrieeeeed.

Hmmm. . .

I am here. Not flying, not falling. I'm in somewhat an awkward suspension, a dangling in space. I'm somewhere between "understanding marriage" and "no longer waiting for a ring."

15.11.18

What Are The 7 Wonders Of Life According To You?

Hi, hi! It's been a minute. Working a 9-5 job as well as planning a wedding (in fact three weddings. A court wedding, a traditional wedding and a church wedding. Phew!) have been taking the biggest chunk of every twenty-four hours I get. Happy I can squeeze out time to write a post here. May we never lose our wonder in the passage of time. Amen.

The Seven Wonders Of Life


You have heard a lot about the seven wonders of the world, and may have even visited few or all of them. But have you ever given a thought about the 7 Wonders Of Your Personal Life?

I mean, have you?

Life in itself is a wonder. Life is full of wonder. But sometimes we get carried away by the busyness of our life and miss out on the things that make life wonderful for what it is. I've continued asking people the same basic question. How do you stay fully present, fully-engaged, fully-alive? I've also asked my private diary like a beggar asking for scraps of wisdom , "how do I not lose myself in all of these?" And the answer is astounding:

"never lose your childlike sense of wonder." (Thanks to Bethel Music. Yo!)

So, what is wonder? According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, wonder is a feeling of amazement and admiration, caused by something beautiful, remarkable, or unfamiliar. Oh, I love this definition. Wonder gives depth to our passion. Wonder reignites our faith. Wonder asks us to live with eyes wide open to God. Wonder invites us out of the shallows and into hallows of the divine.

The wonders about life are relative. Because we all look at the world around us differently, so what strike wondrous to you is unique to you.

I'll share a few wonders about my life (perhaps I should say as at today, they could change, right?) while you share yours in the comment box:

30.10.18

Dear Diary, I've Got Something To Tell You

I’m staring at this blank page and thinking: This is one of the most important things you’ll ever write. Be brave, Amaka. Steady. Clear. Shameless. Gentle. True.

There Is Someone Now


I will pretend it’s just the two of us here in the kitchen. I’m making us toast bread. I pass a tray to you and ask you to come sit down on the bed with me. You follow me into my room, we sit down and I am looking at you. I can see that you’re nervous because you’ve figured out I’m about to tell you something important. So I quickly say: I'm fine. Everybody is fine. All is well. We are all okay.

We are. And yet.

Then you look at me with your eyes wide open, not knowing what to ask. Your expression does not tell me whether you are confused or surprised. You are quiet and look quite interested in what I am about to tell you . So I slowly say: I met someone.

30.9.18

STYLE: Can Purple And Red Be Worn Together?

This is not the most interesting colour combination I've ever put together, but at the same time it's something I would easily throw on to work once in a while.

Red + Purple Outfit


Once upon a time, there were certain colour combinations that were considered “fashion don'ts” in the style dictionary. Navy and black, gold and silver, and yes, today's duo: purple and red. But those days are far behind us.

Now you can wear whatever suits your mood, taste and personality.

However, sometimes the weather affects your mood. But when that happens, let your taste and personality win!

Last Wednesday, the weather affected my mood. It rained all night till the early hours of the morning. Knowing there’s nothing worse than getting caught in the rain unprepared — Slogging around in wet shoes, windswept hair and a totally drenched ensemble is no way to spend your day. It’s just downright unpleasant.

So I respected myself and wore my red sweatshirt on my midi purple skirt.

25.9.18

Dear Diary, I Am Standing In Awe

I woke up singing the chorus, "I stand, I stand in awe of you" by Hillsong Music. I sang it all through my journey to the office. When I got to the office, I looked for the song on SoundCloud and got my earphones on. I am literally standing in awe of God in this very season of my life.

Standing in Awe


Every song that refers to God as "awesome" is currently my fave. I'm searching for as many as I can lay my hands on. I am singing them all to God. Yeah. Yeah.

How do I even begin to describe how awesome God is. . .?

Ah, how do I start?

I am so loving this genuine sense of wonder I am having of God right now.

Lord, You are awesome.

To even say the word "awesome" stirs up a sweet sensation in my heart. I can feel power in the pit of my stomach when I say, "awesome." I sense something rises up inside of me and makes me want to fly.

2.9.18

How To Wear Your Scarf As A Jacket (In 5 Easy Steps)

Happy Sunday sweets! How was church today? It's the first Sunday in the month. Be grateful for where you are already in order to get to where you want to be.

Thought to show you what I wore to church today. 🙂


First of all, you need a long rectangular scarf. Check your wardrobe and look for the longest scarves. Then pick one. 

The pretty leopard print scarf I’m using here is about 70″ long x 26″ wide. The longer the scarf, the larger the arm openings will be. The width of your scarf determines how long it will be on your body, aka where it will hit: waist, hips, thighs, etc. Mine is 26″ wide and therefore, a fairly long jacket. The fringe on the ends of your scarf creates a fun detail on the front of your jacket.

Now the steps . . .

28.8.18

Dear Diary, I Feel Heavily Pregnant

How can someone who's never ever been physically pregnant understand the feeling of pregnancy? Well, thank God for Google and the likes. I am reading everything about the feeling that comes from the expectancy of a new born baby. So it is relate-able.

Will This Baby Ever Be Born?


I've been "pregnant" so many times. Pregnant with a word. Pregnant with a vision. Pregnant with a dream. Pregnant with a promise. And in all my pregnancies, I have come to understand that timing is VERY important. In fact, timing is everything.

Life exists in time. Time is the river of Life. God gives us Time as the medium for carrying out our life’s assignment. To every purpose, there is a timing; to every assignment, an appointment. To fulfill destiny, God packaged us in the entity called “Time”. To live out the promise, God prepares you for the time.

Sometimes the spiritual pregnancy is long and hard. Sometimes it's frustrating. Sometimes you just feel like you are going to bust wide open. Sometimes the labour pains feel like too much to bear. Sometimes you don't feel like pushing any more.

Some pregnancy end in tears. Some birth bundles of joy. Some come with pain. Some birth streams of opportunities.

27.8.18

The Fish Is Not The Point

Hiya! I bring us good news! The good news is that we are not alone in our frail, human state. The Bible is full of men and women who, despite their best efforts, suffer from a chronic lack of love and character. One of them is Jonah.

May you be inspired by this character I have come to find amusing too. Amen.

Sometimes We Are Jonah

Source: Bible Stories

Over the weekend, I studied the entire book of Jonah. And it brought an illumination to the truth that sometimes we are Jonah. We run, we are swallowed up, and we are spit out.

Sometimes, just like Jonah, when we have so many responsibilities thrust on our shoulders we feel that life is too much to handle. Who wouldn't want to book a cruise, get on a ship, and run away from all the wahala (trouble)?

29.7.18

WIW: You Already Have What You Need

I know, I know. The title of this post sounds ridiculous to you. I’m not saying you should stay in a perfect state of contentment. I am saying you should focus on what you have.

Life, as I come to realize when I’m thinking most clearly, is so duper good. Even when I’m not yet married, not earning the salary I want, and even when things aren’t quite going exactly my way, I can still look around and say, “Wow. I am thankful for what I already have!”

You Already Have It


In January, I started Sunday-Style by telling you that my wardrobe strategy for 2018 would be "work with what you have."

We are now almost in August and I am proud to let you know that one of your favourite Lifestyle bloggers has lived truly by keeping through to her word. Awesome. I deserve some accolades. Lol. The only new clothes I got are the ones I had to specially get for specific occasions like the other day.

Gone are the days when I take a long look at my wardrobe and say to myself, "I have nothing to wear." Last year or so, I wrote 'How To Repeat Your Clothes Without Anyone Knowing," if you haven’t read it go ahead and check it out. It's still the same thing I am sharing with you today.

23.7.18

Who Gets Excited About Monday?

Imagine waking up in the morning and you scream "it's Monday! I am so excited to get back to work!". Imagine slapping the alarm off and then break into a musical inspired montage where you tap dance to the bathroom and breeze out the door, excited for what the day holds for you.

That might be a bit exaggerated but it doesn't hurt to imagine, does it? 😀

Get Excited About Monday


Who gets excited about Mondays? Well, it depends on who you ask. Someone who only works on the weekends would be super excited because Monday is the new Friday for such a person.

However, if you work the regular Monday – Friday, you might have to "find" some excitement about Mondays.

In prep for a new week, here is an inspirational quote.

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”

22.7.18

STYLE: The People In Your Picture

Hi Sweethearts of my blogosphere! It's been a minute. How have you been? How is it going? I'm doing fine myself. Hopped in to say hi and thank you for being here. :)

People In The Picture


My intention is to share another inspiration of 'what I wore' but something else seems to be happening to this post. In the course of taking personal pictures for today's 'Sunday-Style' post, the location was hijacked by some Boko Haram, yes the bombers showed up (please take the pun likely, lol).

I see my script changing. . .

Well, this story has to change because there are other people in the picture. I am not the only one in it.

So, the hard truth hit me badly:

It is not about you.

8.7.18

Styling This Very Moment

Hey there! How are you feeling in this moment? Yep, in this very moment you are reading this. If you're aware of that feeling right now, then you're living in the moment! 😇

Styling This Very Moment


I told you I'd be taking a break off the blog for about three weeks so that I can commit to writing and finishing the 'HWMH' book but hey, I'm back here in less than two weeks. I couldn't help but to fully enjoy this moment and live in the present. 

There is something uneasy about holding up for the future and letting the present slip by. It is not a comfortable position to be in because life unfolds in the present. And sometimes we could be letting the present slip away, letting time to rush past unobserved and unseized, and squandering the precious seconds of our lives as we worry about the future and ruminate about what's past.

1.7.18

What I Wore: The Truth About How Long It Takes

Hi sweethearts of my blogosphere! Happy New Month! Glad we made it into the second half of the year. Thankful for life and everything else.

It's Style-Sunday!

Long Ankara Skirt


Like I told you here, I am writing a book. For now we'd call it #HWMH. And writing HWMH has not been easy.

Writing a book, a fictitious story about your life in a way that will interest anyone other than your mother is not a joke. In fact, “this happened to me” and “here’s what I think” posts can be boring if care is not taken. . .and can even make you appear as a narcissist.

But then a blogger like yours truly comes along and hopefully wishes to eloquently share her own personal story about her thoughts and life — style, career, relationship, everything. Only she’s not writing in retrospect, with the insight of knowing how her story will end. Instead, she’s telling this tale as it unfolds.

20.6.18

How To Love Your "Enemies"

A good old friend asked me, "is there anybody in your life right now whom you are not in good terms with?", "Nobody" I responded unconvincingly. Then my friend asked again, "are you sure there is n-o-b-o-d-y? How about your colleague, the one you told me about?". "Erm.  .  ." 

Then it dawned on me that I was erring. 

Loving Your Enemies


In this part of the world where I come from, we generally think that "enemies" are our "village people". People who totally mean harm and only wish the worst for us. Lol. Funny but not funny.

On today's article “your enemy” doesn’t just mean the enemy in your village, of course. We’re not talking about witches and wizards or the monitoring spirits (kidding!) . . . we’re talking about real people. So

18.6.18

5 Things To Learn From Children

Hi sweethearts of my blogosphere. I hope you enjoyed the holiday? What did you do? Where did you go? I did so much that coming here was almost totally impossible. But glad I'm here now. Yay. Let's feign the excitement once again. Yay, lol.

Spending time with a friend's daughter during the holiday got me all mushy and stuff.

Lessons From Children


I think my profound love for children has just been rekindled by the awesome moment I had with my friend's little daughter during the holiday. She is such a cutie. Aww!

Not only did she get me to remember what it was like to be a kid, she also reminded me about the super-awesome time I had being a children teacher/storyteller!

Yes, I used to be a children teacher. And I used to be a children storyteller on radio. Yes, really. I hosted a programme called "The AAK Show" on FUTA Radio some years back. One of the major highlights of the show were the funniest answers kids gave to the questions asked about the story I told. The answers were often hilarious – even if the kids weren't in on the joke. They were so much fun.

12.6.18

Dear Diary, It's 14 Days To My Birthday!

I am not quite sure why I feel like this is my 30th birthday. Could it because I'm now nearer to 30 than I am farther from 20?

Counting Down 


I love birthdays.

Usually on my birthday each year, I reflect on where I’ve been and where I want to be in the year to come. But I think part of the gift of getting older is learning to celebrate where we are right now, who we’re traveling with, and how far we’ve come. The beauty is in this moment.

And in this moment, I’m feeling beyond divinely blessed. My first thought is that I feel so blessed to be alive. That’s a cliché but it’s a genuine feeling for me today.

In this moment, I’m surrounded by love in my life at every turn, and I’m thankful for it every minute of every day.

11.6.18

You've Been Set Free. Walk In Your Freedom

I'd probably read "you are free indeed" in my Bible a hundred times but on one particularly difficult day, I found myself wondering how on earth it could be true. If Jesus had already set me free, then why did I feel so bound up? Why was I still stuck?

And so began my journey to find out what freedom really is, and how I can walk in that reality.

Walk In Your Freedom


I've come to believe that freedom is both a one-time gift and a process. The moment we come to Jesus Christ, He gives us freedom through the Holy Spirit so that we are no longer slaves to sin. But that freedom is something we need to learn to work out walk through.

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.
– Galatians 5:1


The fact that Apostle Paul wrote this warning not to the world but to the church (Galatians 1:2) and that he used the phrase “again to a yoke” indicates that he knew it was possible for us to become bound. . .bound again.

10.6.18

Fashion As Freedom Of Expression

Happy Sunday! Today's Sunday-Style post was inspired by a case which transpired between Falz, a Nigerian music artiste and MURIC, a Muslim society for having dancers wear hijab in his video. (It's in the news! Read here.)

I personally think it is a case between the freedom of expression and the freedom of religion. Both freedom is inextricably entwined but freedom means different things to different people. 🤔

Anyway let's talk style, shall we?!

Freedom Of Expression Through Style


First of all, how is freedom and style connected?

If

freedom is defined as: the power or right to act, speak or think as one wants without hindrance.

And

style is defined as: the manner in which something is expressed or performed.

Then we can say

if someone has the freedom to act as they want, this would include being free to express themselves through whatever medium they like. . . through their own sense of style.

6.6.18

Why Do People Have Pre-wedding Photo Shoot?

Hi sweeties. It's Love-Wednesday! This is the topic that landed on my fingers today. Yeah, pre-wedding photo shoot 🙈

Pre-wedding shoot is a photo shoot that usually takes place three to six months prior to the wedding day. Do you think they are neccessary?

Pre-Wedding Pictures Ideas


I posted the above picture on my Whatsapp status with the caption "pre-wedding shoot". Oh my God, the reaction was unbelievable.

The congratulatory message almost got me teary. It is amazing to know that my friends and family would love to see me getting married. Lol.

What an expensive joke. Jeez.

Sis Floxy

3.6.18

STYLE: Colourless Wedding Guest Outfit

Hi sweeties! How are you doing? It's the month of June! Welcome to a brand new month. My birth month. Yippee!

What do you do when you don't know what to wear to a wedding? Finding the perfect wedding guest outfit may seem easy, but sometimes it is not. It's either because you can’t find a style that works for you, a colour that matches the day or because you have a dress in your head but can’t find it your wardrobe.

Here is what I did 😉

Colourless At Wedding


At every wedding I get to attend where I am not on the bridal train or among the asoebi friends, I find it pretty difficult to pick out what to wear.

When I think about what I'm going to wear to a wedding, I almost instantly think about the type of dress, but also the colour. Yes, the colour. Very important.

For you too, right?

30.5.18

He Needs Your Love Now, Even If You've Never Met Him (Pray For Your Future Husband)

You don’t become a praying wife and/or mother overnight.

Pray For Your Future Husband


I often pray for my future husband. But sometimes it can be hard to pray for someone you’ve never even met before! So what are you supposed to pray? How can you pray deeper, more meaningful, and powerful prayers for your future man?

When I got this book 'Prayer For Your Future Husband' written by my darling sister and friend, Frances (who is now known as Hephzibah), I immediately knew I was going to take up the challenge. But it lingered.

I finally did it. Fully.

This prayer challenge is near and dear to my heart, and has taught me a lot. I’m thrilled to share it with you! I hope that this will encourage you to pray for your future spouse, or the man that God has already blessed you with.

27.5.18

How To Dress Modestly In Ankara Crop Top

The other day, I did something brave and totally went out of my comfort zone. I wore a crop top. Yeah!

Personally, pieces like crop tops, bikinis, and dresses with cutouts make me feel self conscious. I have always been a fan of dressing modestly; however, just because you are a Christian or a modest dresser does not mean you cannot wear the latest fashion trends. So, on today's Sunday-Style I will be showing you ONE tip for how to wear a crop top modestly.

Ankara Crop Top


A number of "Christians" and church goers would frown at the thought of wearing a crop top. However, I am among the group of Christians who believe modesty is not limited to what you wear. Modesty should be an attitude, or carrying yourself respectfully. It's deciding that you're a masterpiece, hand crafted by God, and you shouldn't sell yourself as a cheap piece. God thinks you're beautiful and worthy, no matter what you wear. So the reason we adorn ourselves should ultimately be to honour God and not to impress people. Emphasis on TO HONOUR GOD.

That being said, with different Ankara prints you can choose what suits your idea of modesty from various styles that you adore, in crop tops.

Related Post: How To Wear Mini Skirt Modestly

22.5.18

Dear Diary, I Did It With A Danfo (Public Bus) Driver

Every time I start to write, I ask myself, Do I really want to open my heart for the world to see? My words cannot be erased after it releases. And friends, I must confess. It is scary to dangle my feet out here in mid-air.

With A Danfo Driver


For some of us in big cities, we rely on public transit every single day, usually twice. Whether it’s a motorcycle (okada), a train, a bus or a plane, there are times when you have no choice but to be in very close proximity to a lot of strangers.

Within years of riding buses almost daily, I think there are some definite do's and don'ts when it comes to any form of public transportation. Like, is it OK to eat when riding on a public transport?

21.5.18

Guess Who's Pregnant?

I am very sure that you've already heard about the popular blogger, Linda Ikeji's pregnancy, it's been trending on social media since yesterday! But that is not where we are going with today's post. Thought to first clear the air. Lol. 

I just want to encourage us because when we are expecting something great for our future, we are essentially "pregnant" and waiting to birth what we hope for. 

Pregnant With A Word


We have all seen pregnant women at various times in our life. In the case of married women, we just naturally assume that the woman’s husband is the father of the child (and hopefully we’re right!) But sometimes we encounter unmarried women who are pregnant and one of the first questions that invariable comes up is,
 “who is the father?”

It’s a natural question to ask, particularly when the mother is not married. But it also raises an interesting question in our own lives as Christians.

20.5.18

WIW: The Ankara Prints That Sets You On Fire

Is it acceptable for a grown woman to wear her mother's clothes? Yes? No? While you're pondering on that, I've got something to post for Sunday-Style. :)

Fire Ankara Prints


This vivid fire Ankara prints is one Ankara fabric to slay and rock now. You'll find it in various colours. It easily balances the whole physique, especially when styled appropriately with the focus point on the fire visual.

If you want to spruce up your wardrobe do not look any further, this fire Ankara prints is sure to at least lift your spirits for the better. The bold prints in the this fabric will resonate a similar vibe onto your spirit. . . Setting you on fireeee!

14.5.18

Mistakes Are Okay

Many times, the guilt we feel over our mistakes is much worse than the mistakes themselves.

Can we receive grace to forgive ourselves?

Make More Mistakes


We all want to do everything right, but that is not going to happen as long as we are in this body of flesh, living. If we could be perfect in our behaviour, we wouldn't need God.

Think about it.

Jesus died for us because we could not be good enough on our own to enjoy a relationship with God that is completely holy. If you truly love God, if you are in love with Jesus, you will not want to sin or displease him. You will do everything you can to stay away from sin. But you will sin, and you cannot let that distract you or hinder you from moving on with God.

13.5.18

STYLE: Get The Best Of Your Wardrobe By Changing Your Approach

Happy Style-Sunday! Today I’m going to show you my best tip for getting the most out of your wardrobe when it comes to combining colour. Leggo!

Change Your Approach


Most of us fall into strong habits when it comes to putting our outfits together. We tend to take the most obvious solution that mirrors what the people around us are doing or what we've done before. But if you’re going to be “extra”, you might need to shake things up a bit.

Take time one night and play dress up in front of your mirror:

9.5.18

How To Become A Wife Before You Get Married

I think it's time to include 'marriage' on the side bar of this blog, because I'd probably be posting more about marriage than relationship from today. I've been learning and evolving greatly.

Become A Wife Before Marriage


I was smiling. My eyes were producing tears. I was cutting onions in the kitchen. It was one of those special evenings I get to have the kitchen all to myself without my mum popping her nose and acting as a monitoring spirit. Lol. She has this nasty habit of supervising me and making "suggestions" about even the size of pot I should use. Lol. I don't blame her at all. It is her kitchen and it is her husband's house.

So I was cooking yam with tomato sauce for the family. For some weird reason, perhaps not so weird, I was happy and proud doing it.

7.5.18

The Other Side

Do you know what robs our joy faster than anything else? When we know the right thing to do and we don’t do it.

Ah, may God help us maintain our joy!

The Other Side


If God lays it on our hearts to do something, we should better do it. And do it immediately because for every opportunity that you get to choose obedience, you receive a blessing!

Obedience doesn't exactly sound like fun. It actually feels like an obligation, like something we have to do.  We often doubt the motives of being asked to obey, or we think that our way would surely be better.

Why is that so? Because we always want to see what will happen if we do what we do before we obey. That's living by sight. However, God has desires that we live by faith. 

It’s easier to have faith when we can see the end of the story. But often it takes greater faith to obey God’s promptings when it doesn’t make sense at the moment.

6.5.18

What I Wore: Short Hugging Skirt and a Long Ankara Jacket

The Ankara/African prints designs are here to stay and is a must have in your wardrobe. If I don't inspire you to wear more of Ankara, then what in the world am I doing here?

Happy Style Sunday!

Ankara Jacket + Short Skirt


There's this song a colleague always listen to in the office, it's about finding a girl who is both fun but professional and independent. I appreciated the connection made in the song between outfit choices and the assumed personalities they project.

The girl that is fun wears a short skirt and the girl that is independent wears a jacket. Lol.

This song popped into my head when I was blogging this outfit. It struck a perfect balance between elegance and cool.

2.5.18

Break Free from Unequally Yoked Relationship

I was in an unequally yoked relationship that sucked the life and energy out of me! It drained me emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. I never felt so lonely, empty, depressed, and lost!

Glad I can talk about it here.

Freedom From Unequally Yoked Relationship

 
Right at the beginning, I knew the relationship was headed for destruction.

I never wanted to get into that relationship and so wanted to get out of it the moment I got into it. However, I let my emotions lead me and ultimately control me! It was the deadliest place I’ve ever been in my life!!! I not only lost myself, but I also got chained up. In a cage.

I was not his girlfriend and he was not going to marry me but we had a "connection". Connection, was the preferred word for our relationship.

We served on the same team. Our first one-on-one communication was when he reached out to me on the phone; he asked me a work related question. And that one phone call led to other phone calls. I was totally not interested in him because he wasn't any where close to getting married. At least, he was open about that one. Besides, he didn't have ANY of the core qualities I wanted in a husband, but I did find him attractive sha.

Prior to him coming into my life, I was single and really didn’t have any friends (so it seemed in my mind because the devil threw a lie at me and I bought it). So, I was lonely and needed someone to call mine.

30.4.18

Notes From 'Bridging The Gap Between Ruth And Naomi 2.0'

It's April 30. And I can't believe the month has come to an end. April was a blast back to back. Oh, what a refreshing month I had! It was indeed totally different from March 2018. Wai. . .tt, wait, let's not spill until the next Tuesday's Dear-Diary post. 🙂

Here's some dose of inspiration from last weekend's hangout with my girlfriends.

Bridging The Gap Between Ruth and Naomi 2.0


If you have been an ardent follower of this blog, you must have heard me mention 'The Women At The Well (TWTW)' a couple of times. Read here and here.

'Bridging the gap between Ruth and Naomi' is an annual event organized by TWTW. The second edition held last weekend, and it was (*** please help me insert a word to describe how it feels when your heart is sweaming in the ocean of God's love here***).

🎶 how do I describe 
a God that is indescribable?
how do I explain
the love that is unexplainable?

Ohhhh ohhhh ohhhh my heart sings ohhhh ohhhh ohhhh 🎶 

29.4.18

What I Wore: Freedom To Love In Ankara Maxi Skirt

Hi sweeties! It's the last Sunday of the month! How about you express gratitude to God this minute, for being alive and for having those lovely eyes that can see? As for me, I am super grateful. My heart beams with joy. Hallelujah!

This is what I wore to church today :)

Ankara Maxi Skirt 


I didn't attend my regular church today. I visited another. And I had a swell time worshipping in God's presence among His people. Imagine crying while singing lovesongs to God!?! Indescribable!

🎶 You make me happy. You make me whole. You take the pain away. I'm so in love with You . . . 
Oh oh oh. . . my heart sings oh oh oh. . . 🎶 

25.4.18

RELATIONSHIP: How To Turn Strangers To Friends

Several months ago, I told you that one of the odd things I enjoy doing is talking to strangers. Seeing how much I've grown to be open and good with starting a conversation with strangers, I thought 'why not do an article on that?'

It's Love-Wednesday!

How To Talk To Strangers


As they say: "Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet." However, fear, especially unnecessary fear, blocks that opportunity.

If you've always tended to wait until new people start chatting or talking to you, then it may feel overwhelming to reverse that habit.

My goal is to ginger your swagger and help you get some relaxed confidence when starting a conversation with strangers. Leggo!

First things first, I think the best ways to start a conversation with a stranger vary depending on the situation, so we have to treat them separately.



Categories Of Strangers

For the purpose of writing, I like to put strangers into one of three categories, viz:

  1. Strangers in public places
  2. Strangers in common interest areas
  3. Strangers you know, but never met

22.4.18

5 Outstanding Things Stylish Women Do

Truth is, the fashionable friends you envy have some very helpful habits that make looking stylish, confident, and cool a daily reality.

Happy Style-Sunday! I'm so excited about today's post. Leggo!

How To Be Creatively Stylish


When you see a stylish woman and wonder how she has the budget for such fine clothing and accessories and just assume that her income is more than triple yours, think again.

A stylish woman is creative. The reason why she makes looking stylish so simple is because she has her own set of tips and tricks up her sleeve to make it appear that way.

Got some tips to share with you:

18.4.18

Redefine The Way You View Stress At Your Workplace

Hello sweethearts of my blogosphere! How are you doing? I know I've not been regular here as much, please bear with me. There is a lot going on. And work? It has been stretching me.

It's 8:00PM. I thought I could let this day pass because I am VERY tired but thankfully, I found my fingers hitting the keypad. It's Career-Wednesday!

Redefine Stress At Work


Rick Warren says in his book, The Purpose Driven Life; “Work becomes worship when you dedicate it to God and perform it with an awareness of his presence.” I concur!

Sometimes it takes only the presence of the Holy Spirit to keep you sane when the happenings at work try to drive you crazy.

Phew. 

15.4.18

STYLE: 4 Ways To Wear Brother's Shirt

I could simply title this post "4 ways to style Men's shirt" but no. I am particularly intentional about the sister-brother relationship right now, so you wouldn't have to raise your eyebrows when you see posts on "husband's shirt" popping up in a few months. *winks* The just shall live by faith. 😇

Happy Style-Sunday!

4 Ways To Wear Brother's Shirt


Yes, I wear my brother's shirts a lot. It's for bragging rights. Lol. And I don't even try too hard about it because when you are wearing an oversized shirt that belongs to your brother, spouse or dad, you have the freedom to wear it whichever way you want.

Honestly, I would not be exaggerating if I told you there are more than 20 ways to wear men's shirts. You can even see a tip from 'how to wear brother's shirt as a skirt'. However, today I want to show you four buttony ways.

The trick here is to roll up the sleeves and button as you please.

10.4.18

DIARY: On Becoming Strong

There are certain things that have happened in your life that serve as constant reminders of where God has delivered you from.

When I'm Weak, You Make Me Strong


Hot tears splashed down my cheeks as I had been listening to T. D Jakes' sermon when I heard a word God used to answer a question in my heart. In that moment, God's intentions leaped off of the screen and started a revolution in my heart.

I wept and wept.

I never would have guessed how highly God thinks of me. I never would understand how invaluable I am to his kingdom. I felt a strange combination of exhilaration and anxiety about what it would mean to be called a strong woman.

This truth caused me hours and hours of tears. This truth tore me apart inside, ripping at the falsehood I had worn and adorned, shredding my self-made safety nets, and leaving me very broken and helpless.

I gasped for breath as I come face to face with what's real.

What is real is that I need Him.

Without Jesus, I will face the wrath of a Just God who cannot tolerate sin.

I needed help desperately.

And there is a God who says that in Him I can be strong.

9.4.18

Please Relax, Currently Under Construction

We all have weak spots and areas of inconsistency in our character. Until we see Jesus face to face, we will continually need His guidance and correction to take us from strength to strength; from glory to glory. I can worry for Africa sometimes, hence, the Word I received these past days has been "RELAX". Say Relax. Say it with a smile. It's a beautiful word, yeah? But it is not so easy!

Under Construction


Ever seen a building under construction? Construction areas have lots of bumps, lane changes, starts and stops, backed up delays, and falling hazards, they are dirty, noisy, disorganized confused untidy hectic and disgusting places. But if you talk to the Architect, they will say that the construction area is beautiful despite of all of the chaos that is going on because they SEE what the end product is going to be — they know that what they are looking at is the process of progress.

8.4.18

What I Wore: One Gorgeous Ankara Top For Every Event

Happy Style Sunday Sweeties! Today's post will be a two-in-one package so we can cover up for last week. That's a good idea, right? 😀

No Two Events Are The Same


They say "you can never go wrong with a black dress." It's true. Every lady knows that. But I want to reveal another unpopular fashion fact:

"It's hard to go wrong with a piece of Ankara that fits your personality."
— Nwamaka Ajaegbu, Personal Stylist

Let's just say I've been proving this "theory" with most of my What-I-Wore posts. Here are a couple of them:

4.4.18

RELATIONSHIP: How To Deal With Having Too Many Suitors

For ladies waiting to be married; among our struggles is having too many options. My aunt has this to say to you:

"GET MARRIED NOW. . . you are being too picky! The one you want 'WILL NOT' want you. Choose one of your options. Make him what you want your man to be. They do not come 'ready-made'. I made mine."

What do you think? Let's talk. It's Love-Wednesday!

One Heart, Many Suitors


Men always blame women for not being patient and knowing what they want while women tend to blame men for not growing up. But that is not always the case.

There comes a time when a man wants to get serious with one woman and wants to settle down, and put that ring she so crave on her finger. What would you have a woman do if all the men around her get to that point in their lives at the same time?

3.4.18

Dear Diary, I Broke The Bank

Is March over yet? Thank Goodness! For obvious reasons, most people would agree that January is the longest month of the year but for me, March was longerrrrrrr!

Marching Over March 2018


It's the 23rd day of the month and my bank account already looks like a graveyard. I thought I was good with money! Ah!

Actually, I’m being a bit dramatic. I am good with money – good with the big stuff at least. I’m good at setting aside a big fraction into investments for both the kingdom of heaven and the kingdom of earth (If you know, you know). I’ve always understood the raw yet subtle power of compound interest (thanks mum) and so I’ve always acted accordingly. And in general that has made my financial life calmer, saner and more predictable.

Where I really struggle is in the day to day expenses. I’m incorrigibly impulsive when it comes to small to medium purchases like daily snacks and cookies and weekly trips or takeaways. Let me not even talk about the cost of transportation in Lagos. Phew.

2.4.18

Yes, We Can Face Tomorrow!

Hello sweeties! How are you doing? It feels good each time I have to post something on my blog. I think I'm still thrilled about being a lifestyle blogger. It is something I never saw coming. Really.

And you have made it more fun. Thank you. 

We Can Face Tomorrow



The song illuminating my heart even as I type is:

"Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, All fear is gone.
Because I know He holds my future.
And life is worth the living just because He lives."

I can't get enough of this song. I have been singing with all excitement and joy. I have sang high soprano, high tenor and high alto. I have also sang low tenor. Now I am singing high bass. Lol.

31.3.18

PODCAST: Obey Your "Heart Rays" Call

Podcasts technically resumed yesterday, Good Friday. Wow. Who is excited? Definitely not me. Lol. 

When God commands you to start a project, a business, or a ministry, please start with whatever you have. Don't waste time like me. God rarely move until you move. 

This short audio clip is a move on my part.

~ Rays Of Obedience ~



Please 'listen in browser' if you don't have Sound Cloud App on your phone.

29.3.18

People Don't Read Blogs Anymore

I know people don’t read because what I write is so often not the trending societal issues or more often than not, about me. It can get really boring, yeah? You don't have to tell me. I know.

#BringBackOurBlogReaders


I have a special kind of love for those who read my blog. In fact, I have a special name for them — SWEETHEARTS. They are one of the best groups of creative humans with a heart so sweet that they enjoy the atmosphere of Heart Rays.

I miss quite a number of them 😢

28.3.18

It Is Not About The Money, Right?

It's Career-Wednesday. I hope you are among those who believe the best job for you goes beyond the salary you earn. Sometimes you might get discouraged when you focus on the money.

I write to shift your focus.

Beyond The Pay


You will be tried and tested.

You will be beaten down by failure and humbled by criticisms.

In your moments of self-doubt, more money is not a big enough cause to drive you.

More money is not the motivation you need to do the hard things that being successful demands.

More money is not enough reason to base your decisions.

26.3.18

The Struggle With Obedience

Wondering why I had not been on the blog for over a week? I was struggling to obey God on a particular instruction like the 30-Day-Man-Fast. I was struggling so hard that at a point, I even started to think I was under the manipulation of the enemy because I found myself where I'd not ordinarily be. It's been crazy.

My Struggle With Obedience


Writing this article is convicting for me. I try my best to obey what God has called me to do but I'm not always as obedient as I'm called to be. Maybe you're like me in that aspect and you're not as obedient as you'd like to be. Take heart!

Oh, I wanted to mention a couple of examples and evidences of how this struggle, in my life especially, is one that I have been dealing with for a long time. But then again, I am led to not share the details (just yet).

Obedience is not fun. Sometimes it can be lonely, and other times it can be painful.

I just couldn’t seem to find a way to consistently choose Him over myself. I couldn’t seem to be able to live for his affections over those of the world. As hard as I would try in various seasons, I just couldn’t be completely obedient.

The other day, He responded with this verse:

"Stop right there! If you love me, you will keep my commandments." 

Like a hammer, it hit me hard. It was active, energetic and powerful.

25.3.18

What I Wore + How To Spot Fake Ankara

Happy Style-Sunday! I decided to make a post out of a Friday's outfit because yo, it is worth it. When it comes to spicing up your outfit with ankara fabric, you are sure to always count on  your girl. ;)

How To Spot Fake Ankara


There is a massive supply of Ankara fabric out there. I buy, sew, and wear Ankara pretty much. And I see the need to help you differentiate the fake ones from the original so that nobody would cheat on you the next time you go to the market.

What To Check Out For

  1. Texture
  2. Water resistance
  3. Colour design
  4. Print pattern
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