Wednesday, 20 July 2016

RELATIONSHIP: When They Leave Without Saying Goodbye

We are so good with openings. But very terrible when it comes to closure. We say hi, and don't say goodbye. Why some relationships end without having an end is yet to be understood.

Without Saying Goodbye


When someone comes into our lives, we open our heart. A story starts being written.

Unfortunately, life is not exactly a book with clear plot chapters, and a story that wraps up in 200 pages. There are many moments in life when things that cannot be explained happen.

Things like someone leaving you without an explanation.

Appear.
You say hello.
I say hello
I like you.
You like me.
I fall in love.
Then . . .
Then . . .
Disappear.

When someone who you once loved leaves without a word, there is always a what if . . .?. Always a question unanswered. Most of the time you just can't believe it’s over. Are they coming back? Was it my fault? Can I move on?

I've been there.

It is not a beautiful experience.

It is more painful especially if you're someone who loves truly and deeply. I lose a piece of my heart when I say goodbye to someone I love. I realized I should have been more conscious with Jerry, and thought long and hard before getting attached.

Many of us  (OK. Maybe not many, a few of us) get too attached quickly. When we “fall” in love - we do it almost unconsciously, without thinking. There is really nothing wrong with that. We are special beings. We are the few called to love away. However, when people walk away from us, we find it difficult to move on.

Oh. Falling is easy, it’s the getting up and moving on that’s tough.

I think it's fine for me to say I've learnt how to get up and move on. I've grown over sulking. I have come to know that life after a breakup (even without a goodbye) can still be meaningful, happy, and exciting.

Related Post: You Either Leave Them Or They Leave You

Has anybody ever left you without an explanation? Have you been ignored for a very long time? This is what you can do:
  1. Remember the times you've been happy without him/her. You were happy before they came and therefore you can be happy after they'd left. Your happiness is not dependent on anyone. This was just some jerk who didn't care much about you, because if s/he did, s/he would given you closure.
  2. Learn to be happy around yourself again. Do all those things that make you happy and be around the people who make you happy.
  3. Write down all the things that did not work between both of you. Learn from it and remember why it was actually a blessing for him/her to leave. But never, ever keep this guy/lady on your mind for too long.
  4. Don't be in denial. ACCEPT it. Accept that this was the same person you once loved is the same person who has now left, and you will never look back. The key thing here, is acceptance.
  5. Above all, ask God for strength to move on.

Listen To: How To Get Over An Ex


Life goes on.

See, in this life, we will all say goodbye to each other at the end. We are all learning and growing for now. Growing up is learning to say goodbyes - the small, every day goodbyes, as well as the bigger more painful giant ones.

I just hope we learn to appreciate the little time we spend together. And say goodbye properly! Ha!

P.S On a lighter note, when I lost my phone in May, I could hardly believe "she" was gone. "She" left without a word. I missed her so badly and silently prayed "she" would come back. She didn't. I got over her and moved on. Here we are!

Why can't people breakup maturely? What's your take on someone breaking off a relationship over the phone?



Written by Nwamaka Ajaegbu 
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Heart Rays . . . giving out  the light.
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