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12.6.20

A Woman Is The Girl Who Accepts Herself

I only started recognizing myself as a woman in my late 20s. I was very much OK with being just a girl.

I Am Woman 

A grown up girl

In my early 20s, I felt the need to be perfect. Always. I wanted to be pretty enough for attention, but not too pretty because pretty girls were called bad names. I wanted to be free enough to have fun with everyone, but not too free to well. . .be one of those bad names. I wanted to be everything to everyone all the time

It was draining.

It took me almost half of a decade to know that I am a pretty woman whether married or not.

It wasn't entirely my fault that I felt that way though. Most churches only call females who are married "women". Those who are single are either called ladies, sisters or youths.

Accepting myself as woman wasn't a natural thing for me. It never really occurred to me. In my head, it's a title that comes with certain achievements. I had to revamp my mind.

Me at 26.

Has anyone noticed that when men reach physical maturity, they become men? Like it just happens. They don’t apologize for it, and they don’t give it much thought.

But women? We seem to be missing that trick. Instead, long into our late teens and early twenties, we still refer to ourselves as girls, the technical term for a female child.

Let us always remember that being a woman has nothing to do with that internal list of things we attribute to womanhood.


In my 20s, I learned that my mistakes make me a better and stronger woman.

I think that being a woman means to accept yourself exactly as you are, to give yourself permission to grow and evolve, and to help make the world a better place.

Perhaps, this is me becoming a realer woman. A-ha

Whatever. Yes, I accept myself as a woman but deep in my heart I still think I'm a teenager or something. Is that a good thing?

This woman right here might never stop being girl. By the way, my name is Nwamaka. If you know, you know.

No matter how old I get, 
I will always be daddy's girl
and Kachi's girl.

* * * *

This is a piece from #20Pieces20 just before I turn 30. Sharing is so much fun!

Thanks for reading. I hope you are enjoying these outpour as much as I do. 🙂

Your turn:
When did you start calling yourself a woman/man?

Stay inspired.
Stay positive.
Stay safe.



Written by Nwamaka Onyekachi
Let's connect on Twitter: @Amakamedia
Let's connect on Instagram: @amakamedia
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Heart Rays . . . giving light.

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