Monday, 11 May 2015

How Do I Stop Being So Indecisive?

I was late again. I was late because it was hard to choose a dress to wear. Yeah. . .yeah. I am that slow when it comes to making decisions. But when I decide to decide, there is no going back.

How Do I Stop Being So Indecisive?


You'll like me to give you a to do-list of how to stop being indecisive. Right? No way. You'll have to decide to make a list for yourself after reading this article. Lol.

I am not here to tell you that indecision is fatiguing and tiresome. And that it steals your time, drains your energy and rubs you off of some opportunities. I am here to help you take that decision already!

First things first, you will have to start by making the smaller decisions the fastest. For instance, when you want to decide on what to eat for lunch or what to wear for the day, do it very fast. Don't think too much for too long.

I remember when it took me ages to choose meals from a menu. How did I overcome that? I just started thinking, "what if I didn't get to choose, and was just given a meal from the menu like that?" I realized I would happily just eat it after all. The realization changed me. Now, I make a quick decision within 20 or 30 seconds when deciding on what to eat. You can too.

Next things next, you can now start to make the bigger decisions faster. We cannot always rush decisions on our careers and our marriages because they will require more thinking (and more praying). But fasten up the thinking (and praying) process and take a decision. Like seriously, there is no point wasting time.

Well, you may want to think you're missing out on the choice you didn't make, relax. Making no choice at all and not getting the benefit from either choice is better than wasting time. One thing is certain, there will be something to learn. 

Before I decided to quit my job, I was scared. Really scared. What happens if I fail? Will I be stuck forever? What if I don’t like it? What if I want to go back, but I can’t? What if I don’t have enough money to do. . . What if. . .?

These were some of the questions I asked myself when I went out there, rolled up my sleeves and started working on my very own project - my dream. Questions that were all highly hypothetical. Questions that I actually never really had to find an answer for.

You might also have similar questions like these:
Will she leave me? Is she the one? Is this the right job for me? Will I have to work this job for the rest of my life? Will I be able to ever feed a family and so on. . .

All of these questions, all these doubts will only eat up your energy instead of helping you. They will only slow you down. They will paralyze you. They will hinder us from taking any sort of decisions.

What decisions are afraid to take right now? It might be the decision to leave your current job. It might be the decision to stop working on a project. It might be the decision to stop smoking. It might be the decision to leave your current boy/girlfriend. It might be the decision to take a course. It might be the decision to start your own company.

Sweetheart, take the decision. Taking a decision allows us to tap into more opportunities that will make us grow and move forward in life. Taking a decision usually opens up the door to ten other opportunities that we may even have to choose from and pick the most appealing ones.

Instead of worrying about all the negative consequences of all the decisions you have to take at one point or the other in your life. You should welcome them and try not to chase them away. I'm currently learning to welcome a particular life-changing decision. (I'll tell you on Wednesday).

Always remember, good decisions are based on the dictates of conscience, commitment, principle, policy, and personal or corporate honour. If it's the right thing to do, decide to do it.

I'll never stop saying; your heart isn't only made for feelings and emotions. It is a place for decision making. Decide to become, to grow, to love, to live. Now!

Happy new week.



Written by Nwamaka Ajaegbu 
Twitter: @Amakamedia

Heart Rays . . .giving out  the light.

27 comments:

Sir gent said...

I have to that decision today! Thanks for sharing Amaka

Vicky Wendu said...

Great words! I also realized that with nearly every decision I make, nobody is going to die and there is no WRONG decision, just a different experience. Taking decisions helps you experience life.

Don44 said...

"Making no choice at all and not getting the benefit from either choice is better than wasting time. One thing is certain, there will be something to learn." #word
There will be something to learn. I like that! After all, life is a risk. Learn your lessons from your mistakes and move on!
Thank you so much for this post!

Guest said...

Indecisiveness used to be my middle name. The question then became what was driving the indecisive bus? What came forward was the fear of making the wrong decision and appearing silly and second was the fear of pissing others off. Creating that awareness helped me to create options and choices to curb the indecisiveness.

To overcome fear is to overcome indecisiveness.

Amakamedia said...

hmmmm .... DECIDE, CHOOSE, AND MOVE ON.

I appreciate your comment, Don44!

Amakamedia said...

Whao. . . Take a decision for a new experience. Vicky, your comment is spot on!

Amakamedia said...

Yes, please do! I wish you the best!

Amakamedia said...

So true. Indecision and fear go hand-in-hand. The fear of failure or the fear of making mistakes. Good to know you have overcome this. Thanks for visiting. :)

Desmond S. said...

Hello, you make it sound so easy. It is nit that easy to just take a decision. Especially if it is going to determine your destiny/future.

Vicky Wendu said...

Lol. It's not easy but it's simple. One thing is that when you make a decision, you are going to run with it. No looking back. There are very few exceptions to this rule. So don't make a decision flippantly. Second, trust your intuition about the right course to take; does it seem right? If it is a complex decision, write down the pros and cons first then go with what seems right to you. It is important to ask other people what they think so you will get some ideas that maybe you haven't considered, but it is your decision and you must above all learn to trust yourself even if it means going against a friends advice.

Zhera Zheus said...

Those who struggle to make decisions run the risk of letting their lives run them, rather than them running their own lives. First time on your blog and I'm living it. Nice one.

Amakamedia said...

Oh, God bless you, Vicky! I don't know what to add to your comment. Thank you!

Amakamedia said...

I know right. We just have to learn to take a decision quickly. Funnily enough, every decision affects your future. What you do today speaks of your tomorrow. For instance, when you "decided" to read and leave a comment on Heart Rays, you did that like few minutes ago. As at then, this is the future. Does that make sense?

Amakamedia said...

Yeah! Thanks for visiting, Zee. Please stay. :D

Fradulinks said...

Thank u for this post. I needed to read this.

lindaspears said...

wow!! this is so inspiring, Amaka. I will just leave this quote: "INDECISION is habit forming and contagious.
Many OPPORTUNITIES are lost because of indecision."
This our blog is working ooo

Deborah Anyeasi said...

You are just a beautiful writer. Thanks for sharing dear and keep inspiring us

Gloria Okaimam said...

Amaka this is so me. Thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

I love your blog Amaka..please check your email..John xx

Glowyshoe said...

As in ehnnn...i really dont think therez a cure for indecisiveness..it happens a lot.. I just displayed this some minute ago

www.glowyshoe.blogspot.com

Tomi 'Molola said...

Funny enough yeah, when it comes to making big decisions, I don't waste time at all. I always know exactly what I want. But when it comes to smaller decisions, I'm very indecisive. Like what hair to make, what to wear, what fabric to choose, what to eat. It's so annoying

Molola's Blog

Pamela Ugochi Orji said...

U nailed it dear. I really love dis. Thanks for blessing my day.

Pamscrib.blogspot.com

Chioma Dike said...

We need to realize that there is no road map for our lives. The only route you can take is the one you can create for yourself and taking a decision will only get you there faster and sooner. Amaka, you're a saviour ;)

Myra said...

I just keep loving this blog. Nice one again dear. Deciding wrong, making mistakes and failing at your relationships or your career can be the best thing that happened to you. You will learn from them..... I'm talking from experience here.

Amole John said...

Love this: "Well, you may want to think you're missing out on the choice you didn't make, relax. Making no choice at all and not getting the benefit from either choice is better than wasting time. One thing is certain, there will be something to learn." That hit me.


Thank you Amaka Media.

bolateethole.blogspot.com said...

I have the same problem. I am suffering from indecision and procrastination. And it's really slowing e down biggerly.
God help me, biko

E Rella said...

Nice write up Amaka..

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